cobaltika

i have not been very frisky or productive at the artTable the past couple of weeks, it seems. a new book is coming along slowly. i’ve finished abut 3 dozen handmade bizcards. um … did i work in my journal? no. finally, though, i have been making some new small pieces in the last two days. of course they are recycled photographs (will i *ever* run out of them?? all the film i wasted … shudder!). and i have been transferring bird engravings! i love them! the birds have the sweetest faces. they must be mostly european birds, because i have never seen any of these creatures. anyway, they are pleasant work.

i have been avoiding the big pale paintings.

it seems spring is finally appearing. there is even blue sky today. i have seen daffodils, hyacinth and almost-forsythia. it’s all so late. i guess there will be a HUGE blowout in a couple of weeks and cameras should be prepared.

hopefully i will be cheered by the season, because i have been glum as hell lately. almost depressed, i think. and still feeling sickish. blech. and i miss the girls like crazy lately. it is worse staying in the town they are gone from and are not to return. it is not like i ever had my own separate life here, really. just a job and a lease. i’m trying hard to stay put though, because i know that bit of retirement dough is a wise thing to keep in mind. i am saving $$ militantly, trying to be ready for escape when the time comes.

i wonder where i will go?

some new things on etsy: hanging objects & more prepared books
lots of good things!

… and …

i have finally started listing many random, interesting and useful things on eBay. starting today with cameras, lenses, filters and flamenco shoes (which are doing very well, don’t laugh!) i am selling Miss Jemima, my Lomo, my Smena8M and my Diana+.

go see if you like?

hopefully tomorrow i will start listing some vintage textiles and clothing and yet more random, interesting and useful things. god it is a lot of work though! setting up photo shots, then listing, thinking of what to say, jeez, then packing and sending. but i MUST. there is so much stuff in this house now. what will i do with it all when i go off to the Peace Corps???

ok, enough advertising. it is rainy and cold and my back hurts so much. i want to start new pieces, but i don’t think i can tonight. my body only wants to lie in a clean flannel nest and read a book. then sleep. mmmmm.

i have really been having fun feeling motivated to finish and list these new pieces. they are very recycled. if anyone does archeology on one, it would be silly. so they are dense in a secret way, even though on the outside they are mostly just pretty little pieces. i wish i could arrange and hang them all over a shredded plaster wall, in an altaristic fashion. instead of the way i am required on etsy. hmmmmm… i wonder if i could make a web page like that? they would be so tiny though…hmmm…thumbnails that click? well, we’ll see. i don’t want to sit at this computer all day. again it is beautiful out and wandering with a camera or two will probably be desired. and there is MORE art to make and scan. and even some mailing to be done! hooray! but my poet will still have to pay for *all* the groceries this week. /-:

already i have had too much coffee, i can tell. what happened? i used to be able to sit all morning with my big white cup, refilling until the pot was empty? now i am about to jump out of my skin. wheeee!

181 white street : 8×10 beeswax collage on canvas

this might be one of the last whitish, over-balanced, waxed things i make for a while. of course never say never. i like it, but it seems so uptight. i am sending it to the WhiteOnWhite collective anyway, assuming i will find a large safe padded envy pretty damn soon. i like it but it feels so rigid. i am trying so hard to move away from that … structure. oh it is hard.

it is a good weekend and i am so happy that i still have tomorrow. all chores were done yesterday, so today and tomorrow are only about long walks, cooking and the artTable. and of course more reading. last night i stayed up until past 1am finishing a wonderful tale (Drop City). and some movies i found at traci’s when i was feeding the kitties and looking for shelby. this morning we took a long long walk in north lawrence. sure i had my camera. but i was not really inspired and the images tell. i realize i am no longer enchanted here, even with the almost-change of seasons. it is very sad. i try, but it feels so forced. i know my time here is done. my girls are gone. why am i still here? yesterday in the Merc, the little checker looked at my $$card and said “are you margaret’s mom?” and i felt so validated. i am their mom! i still am! today i made green chile stew, which was really more like soup, but good anyway, with bolillo and butter. of course we had no *real* bolillo, but i made do with a leftover baguette from the Merc. it is the time of year that you can smell chiles roasting in new mexico and i wanted to smell them in my house. i love roasting and skinning the chiles. and i have worked on a new book that i am excited about, but terrified i will ruin before i finish it. erf. but man i really like it…

i miss everybody.

things worked on this weekend
digital print on altered photo : 1 of 4
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image transfer on altered photo : 1 of 4
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image transfer/mezclado on altered photo. beeswax finish. 1 of 7

it was a good long weekend at home. we took some long walks. watched a movie from the library. ate pretty well (pesto from my garden!). i made a few pictures and read a book and missed the girls (the usual things). but most time was spent at the artTable feeling productive and happy. apparently at the same time wished i would “do something with those dragonflies”, i was transferring them to watercolor paper! great minds! the prints came out really well and i was quite happy with them. the digital prints are fine, too, but i believe i got too carried away with the object-making aspect of mounting them and they seem a bit busy.

i am *very* happy with the tiny mezclado’s though! image transfers of the garages and pointy houses with waxed chinese paper fringe! oooooooooo! i LOVE waxing paper. it has the coolest smooth feel. i have put these new things on etsy.