062007
returning from lalaland. i thought i was having some social anxiety over the weekend, queasy, headachey, a little dizzy, but my monday morning it was fullblown vertigo almost fell into the bathroom sink ugh. now it is going away. much better, but still a stiff spine and a little anxiety wondering if i will fall over somewhere. probably not. i’ve learned to accommodate when it comes. not very often thankgod. i could do nothing but sit still, so i read a whole book in one day! i haven’t done that in forever. it was a new Edna O’Brien that my poet brought from the library. i liked the first one, made it through the second, even though i found the main character rather a big dumb cow. (cruel term, but so true). in this one the character was rather a dummy, too, so i am not sure if i want to read more of her novels, even though i do like her prose. all women need not be heroic, but weak characters bother me. why should i want to read about them? now i am reading A Wild Sheep Chase - Haruki Murakami. i’ve never read him, but so far am liking this, even though my poet claims his prose is too “pop”, with no vision. i like that kind of prose, though, it reminds me of how i write sometimes here. like a stream, dreamy and somewhat pointless. i like to work like that, too. we don’t agree on everything!
yes, reading, sleeping and eating. it’s summer. making photos of the same old stuff around town, all covered in green plush, sweating like a pig while doing it, and dizzy at that, does not sound fun. i’m sure i will though, eventually. working at the artTable made my head spin, but i did a bit last night. nothing wonderful. i seem to only wish to cut up old book pages and glue them somewhere. and then i don’t know where to go with them…
next week i am going to texas and seeing my girls and my family and TEXAS and i am GLAD about that. i do not look forward to the heat. i do not celebrate the summer solstice. i like sweaters.