151106
15 November 2006
i did manage some images on sunday. the usual types of things. neighborhood grunge. it always pays to look closely, though, because i had *never* seen this door and knob before and now i am in love with it.
this week some type of crisis seems to be occurring within. or maybe i am just cranky. but the irritation level seems very high. mostly about art, though it bleeds into everything else, too. i think i am realizing that i am essentially nothing. and apparently with little talent or skill. *nothing* is working on the artTable. yes. the little pieces for encounteredArt. those are fine and fun. but as soon as i try to move on to something bigger, something i have in my head, block. nothing. it can’t manifest. sometimes i am so tired of trying. yet each night i do it. try and fail again. last night i finally got into the nest at 8pm so i would not have to deal with it any longer.
i know i have acquired some skill with the camera. but for some reason, an image on a monitor does just not have the value of something tangible (to me). i want texture, transparency, pale layers of color, secret stories and wandering lines. why can’t it work???