cobaltika

i have really missed writing here. sure. i have been writing. LOTS. but not this, my personal documentation. it is easy to lose the habit. and sometimes it becomes dull, all the public navalGazing. maybe i needed a break? i am not sure if i will do this long writing on *this* journal, i might just keep this one for the visual and put the writing on my livejournal, where i have done it for so many years now. we’ll see … how this goes … if i even continue.

sometimes i don’t write here because i feel so boring. or pathetic (i’m tired of whinyWriting). or don’t have a relevant image or piece of artwork to show. isn’t that silly? how the visual has become such an important, almost required, aspect of online journaling? of course, it is nice, that visual contribution, but i don’t like the feeling that is required. so perhaps i will allow myself to be rebellious, to just get up and write, when i wake at 5am with a head full of words. if people are offended, well … move along. i know i do often enough, when i am not in the mood to read a long rambly post. i usually read though. i am such a voyeur.

as much as i love my visual people on my reading (”friends”) list, i have shyly added some more people - writing people. writing has become sort of a big deal to me and i have much curiosity about people who write. and i like to read lovely and interesting words.

i am growing used to the winter now, the icy lumps of snow and the glazed sidewalks. the frigid air in my lungs. in fact, i like it! this has been the most dramatic winter since i have lived here and it is quite fascinating. on Monday, my poet and i (yes! he came to visit ME!) walked along the river, since it was an astonishing 20 degrees - a heat wave. what has become of the river amazed me. i thought i might be in Iceland. yes, of course i made pictures, i always do, i could pop one in right … here … but … i don’t feel like it.

making pictures and wrestling with the artTable are still very important to me, but lately the writing has become very exciting. i haven’t talked about it, but i *did* continue what i began during nano-month. i have had some weeks of being stumped, not knowing where to go next, or how, or inspired at all. then i will have a week of words, where i wake up too early and have to write for an hour before going to the office, or if i don’t have to go to the office, all morning. yes, in bed, under the flannel duvet, in my nightgown! with coffee!

so the first draft of the thing is almost done. i am just trying to decide how to wind it up. i feel there will need to be written at the end “to be continued” because those people are going to have so much more fun and adventure. then i am going back to clean and embellish. i am hesitant about asking for a reader, although i do sort of want feedback. i did send the first big hunk to Betsy for a critical read, because i trust her, but she is very young and the major characters are middle-aged. i would like to have a middle-aged response, too. but it is hard not to feel protective about one’s work, especially on the internet. ideas are so easily absorbed, even unconsciously. i know the theme of supernatural relocation is not new, but what happens *after* that, with my people, is rather unusual and i want to guard it right now, i guess. so, after it is “finished”, i have no idea what to do next. i guess i’ll figure it out when i get there.

so i guess that is enough for now. it is an office day. i am so glad the holidays are gone.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, January 13th, 2010 at 6:45 am and is filed under random. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.